When was the last time you felt truly powerful?
When you just stepped forward with such confidence, resolve and clarity that you even surprised yourself?
When you think back to that moment, how much do you attribute to something external to you?
Was this driven by someone advising you? Was it enabled by an external resource?
Probably not.
When we feel truly powerful, it comes from within - from an innate, at-your-core, internally incubated resource that feels all at once like a glowing, growing ember that could explode into a showering abundance of energy.
Power can not be borrowed, nor can it be a tenant in your body.
When you're powerful, you are in your most aligned state.
I remember early in my career feeling quite the opposite - like I was a shiny silver pinball being ricocheted off colourful paddles being manned (sic) by the tech bros and middle-aged white men I frequently worked for.
🛎️ Bing! Stephanie, manage this project and maybe you'll get some experience.
💥 Bing! Stephanie, you need to communicate like this, not that.
🚨 Bing-bing-bing! Stephanie, it's your job to make sure we have coffee every morning in our office. (True story, a request made to me by the business owner)
This was even after earning a Masters' degree and years of experience in legitimately senior roles.
I had given my power to those I felt were more knowledgeable than me. And in doing so, I failed myself.
You see, power comes from an unquestionable trust in yourself.
From investing in your progression, intentionally, but also recognizing how far you've come.
Especially as women, we are taught to constantly defer to others. That claiming our knowledge and expertise is "not nice" (and our culture determines that the most valuable among us are the ones who are the nicest).
Time and again I see my clients question themselves, over and over. They look for answers - silver bullets - external to themselves, and place their trust in those who may be knowledgeable, but are not them.
And when you don't practice trusting yourself, you don't ever build your power.
Now, let me be clear... there is always much to learn. And when we stop learning, we stop growing.
There will be things you don't know, and places you arrive that will be unfamiliar. You will question yourself then because it's all new.
Totally understandable, and totally an appropriate time to get help and trust others... it's a great way to build on your own skills and experience during the process.
But I would argue that you still have intuition that is valuable even when you're being supported by others.
At the most foundational level, all we really have is ourselves.
Supplement your work and your journey with all of the rich resources that bring value to your world, but never abdicate yourself of your role in your development, as a business owner or as a human being.
You must stay actively engaged with the things that matter, and lead from your powerful place of inner trust.
Lead your team, lead your strategy, lead the development of your vision.
No one else's process will ever build your dream for you.
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